地位就等于useful吗?

又是很难得,星期六我也在家.无聊的时候,MSN里不想聊的人找你聊,都还是会回应的打发时间.
不过真高兴我这次和他聊.让我更确定的....
学历地位真不是一个人的价值.不见了的是那颗心.

"And phuture is exclusive"

"exclesive?y"

"No fighting no ah BEng no break glass no kids,We have seen all sorts of ppl" "See until sien.They will come n go,They can't last"
"i like phuture ,bcos do not have those matter happen"

"Sometimes u still can see some kids buat drama,Just ignore"

"haha...buat drama!what story they did ?"

"Fight for gals,Bitch bout ppl,Have alot.Nexttime intro to u,Drama colors ur life"
"thanks,if i to be actor,i wont go phuture loh"

"stiva ,they do not have money, no property ,no study,No characters.They have nothing"
"they have their own gooD attitudes de...we cant c it only." "may b in their mind and group,we are weird.from the other hand,it is same,rite?"
"Of course u r wrong!These r sampah Masyarakat!They have no contribution to society!" "Don contribute to the economy,They live a day by itself" "They dream,But lost!They eat shit spread and rot!"
"everyone have their own right to live in life...we cant judge them from the cover ah"

"Whether they make or break" "Better go die.. It's a liability not an asset.. No one will miss them!Don wan talk bout boring stuff"
"........"

"Get on my nerve whenever I see them"
"i just can say u r thinking too over "

"Ya,Better worry bout myself first then them" "I got to be more useful. I don wan b liability"

这段对话,让我突然想到我一伙学历较底的朋友.他们也不喜欢学历高的人.我想我大概知道原因了.
地位,学历,真的使人变的虚假和丑恶.在他们身上我看到的真的是外在...那颗心已经快被腐蚀了.常常之间的谈话都是淡如水,当涉及本身利益时.才真能看见真实的一面.
那伙,虽然拥有的不是学历,地位.可是和他们在一起,看见的是另一方面的真实.讲话方式粗俗了点,因为他们不需要词句的修饰来美化自己,可是却表达了对人直率的特质.从没考虑过金钱的回馈,能帮多少就帮多少.这是我能在故乡看见的画面.

to be more useful,dont wan to be liability.如何的useful?如何的liability?
原来在那么多人的眼中是这样去衡量.虽然自己讲得头头是道,自己也不是如此吗?!
曾经,向姐姐诉说城市人的一面.姐姐想也不想就回答,"去到城市的人都是这样,为了生活.所有人都变得陌生和虚假.这是无法去怪他们.这是人们所要求生存的代价.你...也别讲别人了,你现在在KL,迟早你也是变得和他们一样.你也会变得无情"
"别乱讲话!我才不会!"回答之后,心理有少许的不自在.没错,我几乎快消失了.
对自己,觉得很伤心.发现自己变了...变得差点认不出自己.承认自己的改变时,感觉是非常的不好受,真的很心痛.在夜里,常常不知觉地哭了出来.

用了一段时间来检讨自己,告诉自己,我一定要保持当初的我.